Who??

So, there I was, in a ditch with an elderly couple. They had come off the road and flipped their car over, coming to rest upside down in the ditch. Remarkably, apart from a few scratches, they were unharmed, and desperate to self-extricate. I am always keen for patients to do this, as it makes our lives much easier, but we do like them to have something to lie down on. I called up to the paramedic who was with the ambulance; "Steve! Can I have the spine board?" Nothing. "Steve! Can you give me a hand down here?" Still nothing. I turned to my colleague, who was trying gamely to stop the lady falling out of the car. "What's up with Steve? Is he deaf?" "No", came back the answer, "he's Darren!"